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I was a little late to church today. Just a couple minutes. Not a big deal. I walked in and found a seat in the back.  I sat by myself, which I don't mind.  Within a couple minutes the guy sitting across the aisle from me walked over and asked if I would like to come sit by him and his friend. Sure. What have I got to lose. It was all a little awkward because the meeting was already going when this happened, but oh well. His first line was his name and calling (ward missionary). The last time I met someone who introduced himself this way it was not a very good experience. But, I was hoping for the best.

We finished Sacrament meeting and I said thank you for asking me to sit there. He responded with something about how he would go with me to Sunday School but he had another class to go to. And that was the end of our interaction. And no one else talked to me. To be fair, I didn't talk to anyone else, so I have no one to blame but myself. I haven't cried since last Sunday, and was feeling a bit on the edge of a break down today, so I just tried to stay to myself so I wouldn't lose it.

I appreciate that he went out of his way to sit with me, but I feel like he only did it to check of a box for his calling. Who knows, maybe we will end up being friends at some point. I will take all the friends I can at this point!

My parents get home on Wednesday. I'm really excited about this, even though we live in different states. But at least I will be able to talk to them again.

I went to my cousin's house for dinner tonight. It was so nice to have a real conversation with someone in person. It has been a while since I have had that. Thanks Lani and Reid! 

My great new work friends are probably not going to be friends that I spend a lot of time with. Our interests are very different. Different in ways that will probably prevent us from finding things we can do together very frequently. But it has been really nice to get to know some people.

This last week has been a lot better than the week before it.  There are still a lot of bumps in my road, but I am dealing with them with less emotion.

Why on earth is 24 Hour Fitness not open 24 hours here?! That is totally lame.

Confused

So I get these hives.  It is kind of a bummer.  I thought I understood these hives.  But I am realizing more and more that I do not know about my hives.  I used to think that I got hives whenever I would sweat or get hot or get stressed or ...  However, now I am finding some loopholes.  Today: I walked 1.5 blocks, weeded a garden for FHE for less than an hour then walked back to the church.  Then I walked 1.5 blocks to McDonalds (don't judge) and at McD's got hives.  Not really bad ones, but hives nonetheless.  This evening I tried Jillian's workout again.  (Deck of cards= 84 pushups, 84 lunges, 84 crunches, 84 reverse crunches.  I can explain in more detail if you really want to know).  Anyway, this is the second time I have done this workout and I have not gotten hives either time.  Seriously?  I don't understand.  I took a bike ride last monday for 30 minutes and got crazy hives.  This is all very confusing.  Hmm.  They look something like this when at full flare.  Sorry for the ugly leg shots.

Victory!

It was a fabulous day.  I went to physical therapy this morning and was so excited because my knee has been doing so well this last week.  It is as if this last week was the turning point.  I am still a ways from 100%, but I am doing so much better.  It is great.  So I really pushed myself at PT and everyone was impressed.  Yeah.  And then I went to see my doctor.  He was very pleased with my progress.  So much so that I don't have to come back unless I have concerns.  He did reiterate to me that 2/3 of people recover with PT, whereas the other 1/3 continue to have problems or dislocate again and require surgery of some sort.  Here is hoping that I am in the majority.  He even said I can start getting back into normal activities, as tolerated of course.  And I can go back to work (part time to start).  I am so glad that things have turned for the better.  And he said I don't really need to wear my brace unless I am in a situation that is high risk for my knee.  Good bye brace!  I haven't really been wearing it anyway, it is just that now I have the doctor's approval.  After almost 5 weeks I am back.  And it feels good.  I still have 2-3 months before I am back to where I started, but at least I am closer.  Much much closer.

Speed walking to the max

I have become somewhat of an olympic nut. This is mostly due to the fact that I am currently a cripple and have nothing better to do with my time that watch 24 hours a day of olympics. So what to my wondering eyes did appear last night? Olympic Walking. Yes, you read that right. My dad called me to tell me to look at channel 23 for some great entertainment. It was quickly decided that this would be my new calling. It is kindof sad, see everyone is racing but not really going as fast as they could. It almost hurts to watch them want to catch up, but not able to because they aren't allowed to run. Just a quick jog would take them to the front of the pack. I am not even asking for a sprint, just a quick jog.

Basics of the race:

- 20km (excessively too long)

- you must only walk

- it is all in the hips

- apparently this is another sport in which you only wear your underwear. It seems that with such a long race that you would want something that would prevent possible chafing.

- at the end you fall over. (I kid you not, pretty much everyone did this).

- it is very anticlimactic since it takes several kilometers to actually catch up with someone. No surprise endings here.

I remember speed walking with my roommate our freshman year.  We walked to the library.  It was awesome.

Next sport to watch: Trampoline.

Happy happy day

I went to the doctor today and it was all good news.  I don't have to have surgery, unless I injure it again (more than once a decade).  Also, I am going to start physical therapy next week to get my strength back.  In the mean time I am clear to move it as much as I can tolerate.  I just watched most of a movie with it bent 90 degrees!  And, next monday or wednesday (depending on how fast the swelling goes away) I will get a special patellar brace that will hold my knee cap in place.  And it will allow me to bend my knee and walk and everything.  Yeah!  I still have a while to go to get my strength back since I stretched/tore a bunch of ligaments.  The pain is getting much less, which is wonderful.  And the swelling is down enough that you can actually tell that I have a knee cap in there somewhere.

It was a good day.

Better today than a year ago

There is something about the Johnsons, or to be more accurate the Ashworths.  See when we gain weight our faces expand exponentially.  It is really quite sad.  I know a lot of overweight people who maintain nice faces.  I also know a lot of Ashworths that have huge faces anytime they gain weight.  I could name names, but I will spare you.  I could post pictures, but that just wouldn't be nice.

I have lost a decent amount of weight since I finished college, and probably most of it was this calendar year.  I may not be exactly where I should be, but I am doing better than previously.  I have hit a snag lately because I can't go to the gym.  It is not fun.  It is a long story and involves some very unfortunate responses to sweating in which I actually think my body has developed an allergy to itself.  Luckily, I think I may be coming closer to an answer to the problem, thus a return to frequenting the gym.  Yeah!

However, looking back at pictures from graduation and from now, I look amazingly different.  Someone should have staged an intervention back in 2007.  Things got bad.

I think this was about March of 2007, the arm size is killer, and the face is expanding.

Moving on to graduation, April 2007.  It is no wonder that I never felt like I could never find sunglasses that fit without bumping annoyingly against my cheeks.  I think my face is about to pop.  It is amazing I can even open my eyes.

And this is from saturday night.  Not my all time best, but boy is it better than it was.  I think the straight hair makes me look thinner.  If it wasn't so time consuming, I would do my hair straight more often.  Too bad for being lazy.  At least I actually have a neck now.  And the double chin situation has improved greatly.

Update: just got back from the gym and it was not as bad as it has been.  Hopefully this is going to be a trend and not a fluke.  Lets hope for the best.

I HATE Flagyl

The following is a list of reasons that I hate flagyl. I have listed the many side effects I am having from this horrible antibiotic. If you are weak of heart, this may not be the post for you. If you are sick of mind, keep reading: (taken from http://www.rxlist.com/cgi/generic/metronidaz_ad.htm)
1. Mouth: A sharp, unpleasant metallic taste is not unusual. Furry tongue; these may be associated with a sudden overgrowth of Candida which may occur during therapy.
2. Central Nervous System: irritability, weakness, and insomnia.
3. Hypersensitivity: flushing, nasal congestion, dryness of the mouth, and fever.
4. Renal: polyuria. Instances of darkened urine have been reported by approximately one patient in 100,000. Although the pigment which is probably responsible for this phenomenon has not been positively identified, it is almost certainly a metabolite of metronidazole and seems to have no clinical significance.
Additional symptoms listed in the Rite Aid Pharmacy pamphlet:
5. Stomach pain, loss of appetite, constipation, changes in taste, sore throat

Hence, I am a mess. I am a walking warning label for Flagyl. Oh, and it tastes horrid. We are talking, I nearly throw up every time I take it (every 8 hours). And the taste lasts and lasts. It is pretty great that way.

And the pharmacy pamphlet says I should tell my doctor immediately if I have a sore throat because it could be a serious side effect. Hmm, I have had the sore throat since Monday. Oops.

However, I have lost a bit of weight, if we are looking on the bright side.

I'm really sore

Doug said it would happen, but I am not sure I totally believed him. However, I am now really sore. It must be the 90 minute workout two days in a row, when I am not used to such long workouts, and not used to lifting. I sort of feel like jello. It is a fun feeling. Funny when I can't sit up to get out of bed. Funny when I cant even walk out of the gym because my legs dont want to work. Funny when it hurts to do normal stretching, so I can't even stretch my muscles to help with the soreness. I am laughing really hard. It is going to be hilarious when I can't pick up my babies at work tonight. Jokes on me.

New Shoes

I went crazy today. I bought a gym membership and 3 pairs of new shoes. I seem to shop like this. It is all or nothing with me. I go weeks on end without purchasing anything, then buy everything in one day. I don't know that it is a very good thing to do. Oh well.
New things:
1. 24 Hour Fitness membership
this is great because I can go anytime, which fits my crazy night/day schedule. I also went for the new member trainer deal. I get 5 sessions with a trainer. It will probably be a good thing for me. So Doug and I will be meeting bright and early (5:15) tomorrow to begin our training. I will let you know how that goes.
2. New Balance Running Shoes
I wear my current running shoes to the hospital, which means they should not be worn anywhere else. What goes to the hospital stays at the hospital. Lots of bugs, rather not subject the healthy public to what is on my shoes.
3. Black Mudd flats. They have cute flower and butterfly cutouts at the toe. They are black and have a strap over the top.
4. Brown casual Mudd flats. For some reason the Mudd shoes just fit me right. I am not buying stock or anything. Lots of stitching on these and a strap over the top.
Overall, I am pleased with my purchases. My bank account is a little smaller today, but my feet and body are a little happier. Good trade off.