Tuesday, September 16, 2008

phone calls and BFFs

This guy started talking to me on TRAX.  This is not uncommon.  He was kinda crazy.  This is not uncommon.  Our conversation started based on the fact that I was wearing scrubs.  This is not uncommon.
So anyway, here we are talking about nothing and then he asks if he can use my phone.  This is a difficult thing for me on several levels.  First, he may steal it.  Second, he may call some crazy 900 number and rack up my bill.  Third (and most importantly), he will get his germs on my phone.  And who knows where he has been.  I must have given him a look, because then he asked if I would make a call for him.  Hmm.  He wanted me to call his mom.  This guy was probably in his 40s, and I was calling his mom.  I said okay.  Because I am a gluten for punishment like that.  So anyway, I am calling his mom and he is telling me to tell her who I am and stuff.  Like me and his mom are going to be BFFs.  So I start talking to his mom and telling her that her son, Ernie, would like to be picked up at the TRAX station in 20 minutes (and would it be all right if he went out and played with Billy later on... or that is where it felt like it was going).  Then his mom gets all upset like, why am I always having to take care of my 40-something son.  And here I am sitting there taking all her stress in like we are BFFs.  But we are not.  So then I say, okay well have a nice night.  And she hangs up.  On me.  Seriously, I am just an innocent bystander.  Last time I make a call for a random person.
And last time I give a kid a dollar so he can buy some drugs.  Oh wait that was a different story.


Kim said...

He he. i love this post! i love your face! miss you!

Liz Johnson said...

I think I'm going to sign you up for my dad's "I'm ok what's your problem" seminars. It mostly involves being condescending to stupid people. I think this would have helped in your situation.

The likely remedy he would have recommended?

When the guy first starts talking to you, you simply glance at him with your eyes (DO NOT TURN YOUR HEAD TO MAKE FULL EYE CONTACT) and saying "Uh, no." And if he continues talking to you, you get up and move to a different car.

See? Simple!

The Barbers said...

Oh wow Andrea I was laughing so hard at this post! You are too funny.

Jackie said...

Why is it always you and when I am nt there?