Surgery

Yesterday I had eye muscle surgery. I was cross-eyed, so they went in an fixed it. I came out with an eye-patch on. Arrrgh, Matey!


I tried the percocet and it made me super nauseous, so just tylenol for me.

Today I went in to have the doctor adjust the sutures in my eye. This was about as comfortable as it sounds. He clamped my eye open with a metal clamp thing and then worked away on the sutures. It wasn't too bad because he numbed everything. But I felt like crap after the numbing wore off. He gave me Tylenol 3 to see if that would help with the pain. I took some earlier, and it seems to be helping.

My eye is crazy blood red. And it feels better to sit in a dark room and keep my eyes closed. I've been listening to movies. Ha! And sleeping a lot. And hoping that the next time I wake up I will feel better. Here's hoping!


The doctor said that everything looks awesome. He said that it is the best he could hope for. Lets just hope it sticks! A decent number of people have to get it redone.

Grandpa's Funeral, in pictures

I took some pictures at the viewing and funeral. I thought I would share. I still cry a lot. But he is free from his worn out body.

The last picture I have of grandpa, Aug 30, 2009. At this point he was already moved to the hospital bed in his home, instead of the recliner that he used for years.

Us 4 kids. All of us smiled, which is a feat.

The original 6 in the KC Johnson family. Most of us smiled.

3 members of the Military were there to do a salute at the cemetery.

Much like the guards for the Queen of England, they were very stoic.

The 8 pallbearers that were in town. James, Greg, Chris, Trevor, Ben, Shaun, Kyle, Brett. Eric wasn't able to come.

The casket and flag.

They held the flag above the casket while taps was played.

Not a dry eye as she played Taps. Quite sobering. Thank you for your service for our country.

They folded the flag.

And presented it to my dad, the eldest of the Johnson kids.

Marching away. I wasn't able to get a picture of them saluting my dad after they gave him the flag. I was in the wrong place.

My dad and the flag.

Before being lowered into the grave.

The flowers that made me cry. I typically mourn in silence, in that I don't like to tell people my problems. Well, I had told a couple friends, and they gave me flowers. And I cried like a baby when I saw them.

wash

The other day I put 2 SD cards in my back pocket so that I would have them while I was taking pictures, in case I needed more memory. Today I washed my jeans.

Poor sad lost memory.

Ousted

Just thought I would update you on the study.  After several hours of "screening" on Tuesday I was $100 richer and still unsure of my participation in the study.  On Wednesday I got a call that I have been "excluded".  So, no miracle cure for me.  Better luck next time.

In other news, I have decided to exercise despite the extreme discomfort.  We will see how long this lasts.

Playland

My brother and s-i-l came to visit earlier this month.  I have been very slow about taking the pictures off my camera, but finally did last night.  Here are some of the fun ones I found.  We went to Del Taco one afternoon for lunch and so Connor could play in the Play Land.  I was convinced by the 2 year old to play in the play land too.  It turns out it was a bad idea.  I broke my toe.  And then re-broke it a week later, and again a week after that.  It is healing really well.

Coming out of the slide.

Pre broken toe.  I am still smiling in this one.

He has very blue eyes, I love it!

Cute Nathan

Nathan and daddy.

I love his chubbiness!

Connor was not terribly interested in pictures, he was interested in convincing me to go down the slide again.

Case in point: do not share drinks with toddlers.  Big old spit string commin off that straw.

Neither of the boys really wanted to participate in this picture.

He must be looking at his mom.

This is what happens when you tell Connor it is time to go home.

The good news is, Liz is still smiling.

And one of my cat.  Isn't she cute. (people have been asking for pics of her).

Now I need to go take some pictures of my nieces one of these days.  To prove that they are just as cute as the boys.

enough already.

This is just to say that I am done dating.

I am considering getting a cat.

I just thought you should know.

eeeeeeeaaaiiiii

I just cut up a jalapeno.  And now my hands are burning.  And I made the mistake of touching my right eye, so it is burning too.  I am afraid to look in the mirror in case I look like Quasimodo.  I feel like I am on fire.  Make it stop.  Please.

Oh, and yesterday at physical therapy we did some new stuff.  So I can't walk because my leg and butt on my left side only are very very sore.  Crazy sore.  I am going to have one very buff leg.

Yesterday I actually made the comment "If it is good enough for Emeril, it is good enough for me."  And I don't really like Emeril.  I should have gone with Bobby Flay.

Eosinophilic Esophagitis and why it is not fun

I was just realizing yesterday that I am not sure if I could tolerate a mental illness, but physical problems I can handle.  I guess that is why I have been blessed with so many physical trials.  It is okay, I am a better person because of these things.

I was recently diagnosed with Eosinophilic Esophagitis.  Exactly.  It is about as confusing and obscure as it sounds.  I finally got into the allergist that knows what he is doing (and is a world expert, if anyone can be called an expert, on EE).  Unfortunately he is not covered by my insurance, so I had the opportunity of experiencing self-pay.  Almost $400 later...

Anyway, what this means for me is that my esophagus is inflamed severely, meaning that it is now much too small.  It is fun.  I chew a lot.  A lot a lot.  I have to take a bunch of meds that they hope will help, but they don't know if they will.  Any by "take meds" I mean that I have to either chew the pills or get the meds as syrups so that they don't get stuck in my throat.  And they did a bunch of skin allergen testing.  Luckily (or unluckily depending on your view) I did not react significantly to anything.  Soy sort of reacted, but only sort of.  So for now, no change in my diet.  Although an elemental diet has not been ruled out for future treatment.  Think how much easier it would be to be able to drink all of my food.  That sounds really nice.

So, no real answers on that front.  The amusing thing is that I will probably start being treated at Primary Children's because my doctor is going to start there and my insurance will cover my treatment there.  He suggested we just pretend I am a teenager.  Shouldn't be too hard.

In other news, he said I have cholinergic urticaria.  What that means is that I get hives a lot.  It is not fun.  I am going to have to take medicine for this.  And, since I can't swallow much of anything, I get to take the medicine as a liquid.  Sweet.  Hopefully this will make it so that I can start going to the gym again without getting so itchy.

As always, I am just keeping it real.  At least it is nothing that is going to kill me or shorten my life.  I may sound discouraged, but I am not.  It is going to be okay.  Everything always works out.  I have faith and hope.  And until then I chew very thoroughly.  It is a good weight loss plan.

the good, the bad, and the ugly

This post is not for the faint of heart.  If you are not ready to see some real brusing, I would consider closing your browser window now.  I promise, all I show is my ugly leg covered with brusing.  Nothing else gross. 

The Good:

-I go to the orthopedic in the morning.

-I got more drugs for the pain.  This time it is a higher dose that I can take more frequently.  Thank you PCP.

-Rollover minutes on the cell phone

-I can walk with one crutch around the house.

-The swelling has decreased slightly, as you can see in the last picture (which I contribute to my finally resting my knee consistently)

The Bad:

-I am growing very bored of sitting around doing absolutely nothing all day.

-I have used way way way too many minutes on my cell phone.

-The bruising is looking worse each day still.

-When my PCP walked into the room, both he and his med student said "wow" when they saw my leg.  Never a good sign.

-My PCP thinks I am most likely getting surgery.

The Ugly:

more and more and more

Hard to see, but the bruising now extends to the outer side of my knee.

The bruising from above.

Closer up of the bruising.  Getting more and more colorful.  And it is now extends to mid calf and to both sides of the knee.

Evidence that today I bent my knee.  I am pretty sure that tomorrow (or later tonight) I am going to seriously regret this.

ER

I do not like dancing.  This is something that I have not enjoyed doing, well, pretty much ever.  Last night I decided to step out of my comfort zone and go country dancing with some friends.  I was just going to have a good attitude and be a good sport.  I drove downtown, payed $4 and started dancing.  At the beginning they have a lesson to benefit all of the people like myself that do not regularly (or ever) country dance.  Maybe 15 or 20 minutes into the lesson I injured myself.  I am not sure what move we were doing, but it involved a drop, twist and pull back up.  The guy I was dancing with, who I had never met before, kept saying that I needed to drop lower.  Well I finally did and then I twisted, like you are supposed to and somehow in all of that I dislocated my knee cap.  It is officially called Patellar Subluxation.  Essentially it means that my knee cap went to the lateral side of my knee instead of staying on the top.  I have done this once before about 8 years ago.  As soon as it happened I was pretty sure what had happened.  I felt my knee and realized that may patella was not in place.  Knowing what to do to put it back in place, I straightened my knee.  The dislocation and relocation hurts like CRAZY.  Like you can't breath and you shake kind of hurt.  I sat on the floor unable to move, holding my knee.  My dance partner (don't even know his name) just kinda huddled next to me and had no idea what to do.  The instructor kept going with the lesson.  Good going.  Luckily one of my friends came over to see what was going on.  He asked if I was okay, to which I responded "no".  At that point he yelled for help and I was carried to the side of the room to a couch.  I knew I needed to go to the emergency room, so as soon as the pain decreased slightly, enough to move, my friend drove me to the hospital.

What this means:

1. I am now in an immobilizing brace- mid calf to mid thigh.

2. My knee is swollen like crazy.  It is the size of a grape fruit or maybe a bit larger.

3. I am taking narcotics to try to stay on top of the pain.

4. To add illness to injury, since I can't swallow pills I am taking liquid lortab- sick!

5. I am on crutches.

6. I won't be able to work for a couple weeks, at least.

7. I am not sure if I am going to still be able to go to europe this fall because I will be using a huge chunk of time off for this.  I think this is what hurts the most.

8. I have given up country dancing forever.

After not sleeping much last night I got up and thought I would watch a movie.  Unfortunately the DVD player is on the bottom shelf, almost at the floor and I am quite sure that I won't be able to get to it.  So I laid on the couch all morning watching the nothingness that is on in the morning.  Good times.  If anyone has some extra time and wants to come put a movie in for me, that would be great :)

Oh and we are taking family pictures today.  That ought to be fun.  And I will look very nice with my big brace on.

Some pictures to curb your curiosity.  They really don't do justice to the swelling.  And today my knee is bruised.

I don't like being pressured by your sales pitch

Today I went to one of those time-share sales pitches.  I hate these sorts of things, but I went as a favor for a friend.  You are welcome.

So it went something like this:  First we met in a big group and got a quick introduction from a guy who really thought he was funny.  And who was really impressed that I travel so much (p.s. I don't travel THAT much).  He kept saying "everyone except her..." and pointing to me, because I was already a traveler.  Good start.

Then we went back to sit and talk with a salesman one-on-one.  This is where the fun really started.  Things were going okay (I am being very generous here), until he started laughing at me.  He kept asking how much I pay for hotels.  I kept saying that I never stay in hotels.  This was unheard of to him, how could I travel so much and not stay in hotels?  Apparently it was not acceptable to him that I stay with friends and family.  And weird to him that I have friends and family in so many places.  Here is part of our conversation:

Him: "You are going into debt for your hotels"

Me: "I don't stay in hotels"

Him: "But paying for hotels that you do not own is like going into debt"

Me: "I don't think you understand the concept of 'debt'"

Him: "Yes I do, you are paying money for something you do not own"

Me: "No, debt is when you spend more than you earn.  It is a very simple concept.  I do not spend more than I earn, therefore I am not in debt (except for my condo, but that is a different category)"

Him: "...."

As we went on I just got more sassy and more fired up.  Eventually he said "Now, you are a smart girl, so..." at which point I cut him off and responded "Yes, I am."  He wasn't expecting that.

Next we had a great conversation where he insisted that since I often do not pay for hotels in the places I go, then I must not be traveling where I want to go, only where I can go.  We argued this topic for several minutes.  Apparently smart travelers are not part of their time-share.  And I am not allowed to enjoy vacations that are inexpensive or in which I visit friends/family.

So then his sales-person friend came over and tried to give me pricing.  He made a big mistake by starting with "can you afford $10 a month?"  I said "yes, I can afford $10 a month, but the real question is whether I want to pay you $10 a month."  He just got up and left the table.  But since he had not quite had enough, he came back and asked again if I could afford $10/month.  I said, "that sounds great and all, but I really hate paying interest.  It makes me mad.  And if I pay you $10/month for the next...forever... then I am paying an awful lot of interest to your company, and that seems like a bad idea to me."  His amazing response "But it is only $10 per month, even if all you pay is interest it is really inexpensive."  Seriously.  Do I really want to just pay interest and never actually pay down the cost of the time-share.  And, to top it off, the actual price was much higher than $10/month.

Is anyone surprised that I did not take the bait?  Is anyone surprised that when the 4rd guy sat down to talk to me about my overall experience that day I told him it was a 6 (scale of 1-10), and that I was being very generous in rating the experience a 6?

At least I got a lot of laughs out of it.  And $40 in Home Depot gift cards.  And a 4 day, 3 night stay in my choice of Las Vegas, Orlando, Reno, Kona (Hawaii) or Los Cabos (Mexico).  Where should I go?

Wednesday

Lets start at the beginning.  I have a hard time swallowing.  This is because my esophagus has decreased motility.  It is not very fun, trust me.  Also, in just the last 2 months or so I break out in hives everytime I sweat.  That is not fun either, I promise.  So after getting home from work on Wednesday morning I took an Allegra (prescribed by my dermatologist to help with the hives).  I have had a difficult time swallowing pills for a very long time, but thought I would be okay, the pill is relatively small and is round.  Well that was about 8am.  The pill lodged in my throat.  I will spare you the details, but lets just say at 2pm the pill was still lodged in my throat and I was still unable to swallow even a drop of liquid.  Things were going really well at this point.  I decided that I probably should not be alone since there were several times when I couldn't breath at all during the previous 6 hours.  So, I headed over to my parents house.  No one was home.  Hmm.  I called my doctor and they said that if I could be there in 3 minutes (2:20) I could come, or I would have to wait until 2:50.  I promised them I would be there in 3 minutes, they told me to drive safe and I headed over.  I got there and everyone could see I was in a fair amount of distress.  (gagging and wretching for 6 hours will do that to you).  They got me back to a room (although they first had to get my weight and height...seriously- priorities people).  The medical assistant person took my blood pressure, heart rate and respiratory rate.  My blood pressure was 135/94 (I think), my heart rate was very near 120.  Her comment was "your blood pressure is normal, except the bottom number is a little high".  What?!?  For those of you not in the health profession, the high end of normal for blood pressures is 120/80.  I was definitely hypertensive.  And, she was not concerned about my heart rate at all.  Normal heart rate is definitely less that 100.  The doctor was concerned when he came in because he immediately took my pulse again.  Then he told me that I would be getting an emergency endoscopy.  Ooh, fun.

After a couple phone calls he told me to go over to the hospital.  I was to go through emergency so they could admit me, then I was to go to endoscopy, they would be waiting for me.  I got to the hospital, my sister-in-law Liz was waiting for me (I had called to ask if she would be so kind as to drive me home from the hospital when the test was over since I would be sedated).  I won't go into the details, but an hour after we arrived at the hospital we finally found the endoscopy lab.  Apparently the staff at the hospital still do not know where things are.

They got me set up immediately, sedated me and got to work.

They couldn't fit the endoscope down my throat so they had to use a bronchoscope (a much smaller scope used to look at the lungs), which barely fit.  Then they had to work really hard to dislodge the pill.  So apparently my throat is about 11mm in diameter, whereas normal throats are around 20mm in diameter.

It has been almost two days and it still hurts to eat (my throat tore when he tried to dilate it).  So, I am still on a liquid/soft diet.  Which mainly consists of mashed potatoes.  Good times.

I am hungry.

cycles of hunger

Life has interesting cycles.  For example, my cooking habits have cycled.  In junior high I was all about cooking and I actually cooked quite a bit.  Some in High School.  Then I got to college.  For the first year I held my own.  Mostly easy to make boxed meals.  But I ate.  Then I moved home for the summer.  I found myself totally reverting to being completely useless and dependent.  It was pretty crazy.  I made my way through the rest of college and actually ate pretty well with homemade food and lots of leftovers.  Then I moved home again and reverted again.  There is just something about mom making you dinner.  Now I have moved out and have yet to fix a real meal.  I have lived here almost a month.  I eat lots of cereal and granola bars.  Occasionally I make an omelet or have chips and salsa.  On really crazy days I have a quesadilla.  And until my yogurt supply dried up, I was eating lots of yogurt.  Now all that is in my fridge is cheese and milk.  It is going really well.  Any ideas of how long this cycle is going to last?

Oh and I go over to my parents several times a week for dinner.  That will keep up until they change the locks.

six things

1. Yesterday I moved in. I don't have internet access because apparently the 4 neighbors that have wireless do not like to share. I don't think they passed Kindergarten. I remember sharing and cutting being very important parts of the curriculum in Kindergarten.

2. One of my neighbors came by with her dog to say hi. She told me that all the cars get broken into in our neighborhood. That stinks. Maybe they will just take my whole car so that I will have an excuse to get a new one. I almost killed my car yesterday. Apparently cars need oil. Weird.

3. I refuse to turn my heater on because summer is coming, dangit. So, I absolutely froze while sleeping before/after work last night. I might reconsider the heater thing tonight. If I am really cold. And feel like a human popsicle. Or, maybe if I can see my breath.

4. I have 1 fork, 1 spoon and 3 knives. If you come to visit and expect to eat we either have to take turns or not use proper flatware. Oh, and I don't have any plates. But I do have a lid to a casserole dish that I used to eat my burrito yesterday. I am high class.

5. My dad doorbell ditched yesterday. I wasn't home. He left a couch on my porch. An upholstered couch. It stayed there until after I got home from church today and my brother could help me move it inside. I am officially white trash. So much for making friends in my new place.

6. Pictures to come. Will represent the current state of my condo.

Preview

I am still painting my condo.  I am a slow painter.  And there are a few colors which makes everything more difficult.  But, I decided I would post a couple pictures so you can get an idea of what to expect when you come visit me.  And, you can weigh in on the elphaba-green room.

We'll start with the good, and move on from there.  I really love my blue wall. I think it is stunning.  My mom loves it.  My dad thinks it is ugly.

My mantle is going to match the blue wall.  It still needs a couple coats of paint.  Right now it has the antiqued look.

The chartruese (?) kitchen is one of my favorite parts.  It is just a fun color.

Note that the plant is still alive, it will not be long before it goes the way of all plants I own.

As we make our way down the hall we immediately notice the glow coming from my bedroom.  I was not exaggerating.  This picture is proof that my bedroom emits harmful radiation.

So here it is.  It looks all cute and fun in the pictures.  I still don't know how I feel about the color.

The doorway into my master bath.

Please notice that in this picture the green is different.  It really does change every second.

So there it is.  I still have to paint some more and peel off all the tape.  Which, by the way, when I started peeling the tape off it peeled some of the paint with it.  So, now I get to fix all the edges.  Woo hoo.