Victory!

It was a fabulous day.  I went to physical therapy this morning and was so excited because my knee has been doing so well this last week.  It is as if this last week was the turning point.  I am still a ways from 100%, but I am doing so much better.  It is great.  So I really pushed myself at PT and everyone was impressed.  Yeah.  And then I went to see my doctor.  He was very pleased with my progress.  So much so that I don't have to come back unless I have concerns.  He did reiterate to me that 2/3 of people recover with PT, whereas the other 1/3 continue to have problems or dislocate again and require surgery of some sort.  Here is hoping that I am in the majority.  He even said I can start getting back into normal activities, as tolerated of course.  And I can go back to work (part time to start).  I am so glad that things have turned for the better.  And he said I don't really need to wear my brace unless I am in a situation that is high risk for my knee.  Good bye brace!  I haven't really been wearing it anyway, it is just that now I have the doctor's approval.  After almost 5 weeks I am back.  And it feels good.  I still have 2-3 months before I am back to where I started, but at least I am closer.  Much much closer.

Movie Review: Mummy 3

I saw this last night.  Not my favorite.  The first 45 minutes were essentially an introduction.  Too much intro for my taste.  And, it was rather predictable.  The good news, they did not take themselves too seriously, since it was rather cheesy.  I did laugh a few times, mostly in moments that were not intended to be comedic.  And the previews were good.  I kinda want to see the new movie with Vin Diesel now.  And Rent is coming to theaters only in September.  Wait a second, didn't Rent come out a few years ago.  Yes.  Yes it did.  The difference, this time it is an actual broadway recording and has an appearance by the original cast.  Hmm.  And then there is Disaster Movie.  Reminiscent of Scary Movie, don't you think.  Apparently they have also made Date Movie and Epic Movie.  Although I haven't seen any of these, and don't intend on seeing Disaster Movie, I do remember laughing more during the preview for Disaster Movie than all of The Mummy. 

Not a great reflection on the movie if the previews have a more lasting impression than the feature presentation.

2 stars.

Speed walking to the max

I have become somewhat of an olympic nut. This is mostly due to the fact that I am currently a cripple and have nothing better to do with my time that watch 24 hours a day of olympics. So what to my wondering eyes did appear last night? Olympic Walking. Yes, you read that right. My dad called me to tell me to look at channel 23 for some great entertainment. It was quickly decided that this would be my new calling. It is kindof sad, see everyone is racing but not really going as fast as they could. It almost hurts to watch them want to catch up, but not able to because they aren't allowed to run. Just a quick jog would take them to the front of the pack. I am not even asking for a sprint, just a quick jog.

Basics of the race:

- 20km (excessively too long)

- you must only walk

- it is all in the hips

- apparently this is another sport in which you only wear your underwear. It seems that with such a long race that you would want something that would prevent possible chafing.

- at the end you fall over. (I kid you not, pretty much everyone did this).

- it is very anticlimactic since it takes several kilometers to actually catch up with someone. No surprise endings here.

I remember speed walking with my roommate our freshman year.  We walked to the library.  It was awesome.

Next sport to watch: Trampoline.

Generalized state of my life.

I guess I should update on the knee saga.  I started physical therapy last week.  I did not cry when I hurt myself or during any of those days that things hurt so bad right at the beginning.  I did, however, cry during PT.  I think the difference is that it was self-imposed pain.  I have to do about 45 minutes of PT twice each day.  It hurts and makes my knee swell.  I am not sure if it is productive or not.  I think I am getting some strength back.  I have walked up stairs a couple times normally (while holding tight to the handrail and experiencing some pain).  Down stairs is a completely different story.

After PT last week I went over to get my new patellar brace.  The PA came in to look at my knee briefly to determine if the swelling is down enough for the new brace.  No, it is not.  I did get scolded for not wearing my immobilizer.  I don't like it.  It slides down and rests on my knee cap which happens to be painful.  He said that unless I am on very familiar ground I should be wearing my immobilizer.  I sometimes follow his advice.  I just don't like it.  I try to be very careful.  The swelling seems to be down a little, I am hoping to be able to get my new brace sometime this week.  Here's hoping.

The bruising is down quite a bit.  I don't look nearly as yucky.

I wore heels to church yesterday.  That was probably a bad idea, but they looked cute with my outfit.  I think I will stick with flats for a while longer.  In good news, I have become friends with all sorts of new people because everyone wants to talk about my leg.  They may be using me for my entertainment value.  We will have to see.

In other news, one of my best friends got married this weekend, and it was absolutely wonderful.  I went up to Idaho for the wedding.  I caught the bouquet.  I think this is number three.  Third time's a charm, right?

Happy happy day

I went to the doctor today and it was all good news.  I don't have to have surgery, unless I injure it again (more than once a decade).  Also, I am going to start physical therapy next week to get my strength back.  In the mean time I am clear to move it as much as I can tolerate.  I just watched most of a movie with it bent 90 degrees!  And, next monday or wednesday (depending on how fast the swelling goes away) I will get a special patellar brace that will hold my knee cap in place.  And it will allow me to bend my knee and walk and everything.  Yeah!  I still have a while to go to get my strength back since I stretched/tore a bunch of ligaments.  The pain is getting much less, which is wonderful.  And the swelling is down enough that you can actually tell that I have a knee cap in there somewhere.

It was a good day.

the good, the bad, and the ugly

This post is not for the faint of heart.  If you are not ready to see some real brusing, I would consider closing your browser window now.  I promise, all I show is my ugly leg covered with brusing.  Nothing else gross. 

The Good:

-I go to the orthopedic in the morning.

-I got more drugs for the pain.  This time it is a higher dose that I can take more frequently.  Thank you PCP.

-Rollover minutes on the cell phone

-I can walk with one crutch around the house.

-The swelling has decreased slightly, as you can see in the last picture (which I contribute to my finally resting my knee consistently)

The Bad:

-I am growing very bored of sitting around doing absolutely nothing all day.

-I have used way way way too many minutes on my cell phone.

-The bruising is looking worse each day still.

-When my PCP walked into the room, both he and his med student said "wow" when they saw my leg.  Never a good sign.

-My PCP thinks I am most likely getting surgery.

The Ugly:

more and more and more

Hard to see, but the bruising now extends to the outer side of my knee.

The bruising from above.

Closer up of the bruising.  Getting more and more colorful.  And it is now extends to mid calf and to both sides of the knee.

Evidence that today I bent my knee.  I am pretty sure that tomorrow (or later tonight) I am going to seriously regret this.

Colors of the rainbow

This is my knee today.  The bruising is getting more colorful, which is kind of pretty...right?

ER

I do not like dancing.  This is something that I have not enjoyed doing, well, pretty much ever.  Last night I decided to step out of my comfort zone and go country dancing with some friends.  I was just going to have a good attitude and be a good sport.  I drove downtown, payed $4 and started dancing.  At the beginning they have a lesson to benefit all of the people like myself that do not regularly (or ever) country dance.  Maybe 15 or 20 minutes into the lesson I injured myself.  I am not sure what move we were doing, but it involved a drop, twist and pull back up.  The guy I was dancing with, who I had never met before, kept saying that I needed to drop lower.  Well I finally did and then I twisted, like you are supposed to and somehow in all of that I dislocated my knee cap.  It is officially called Patellar Subluxation.  Essentially it means that my knee cap went to the lateral side of my knee instead of staying on the top.  I have done this once before about 8 years ago.  As soon as it happened I was pretty sure what had happened.  I felt my knee and realized that may patella was not in place.  Knowing what to do to put it back in place, I straightened my knee.  The dislocation and relocation hurts like CRAZY.  Like you can't breath and you shake kind of hurt.  I sat on the floor unable to move, holding my knee.  My dance partner (don't even know his name) just kinda huddled next to me and had no idea what to do.  The instructor kept going with the lesson.  Good going.  Luckily one of my friends came over to see what was going on.  He asked if I was okay, to which I responded "no".  At that point he yelled for help and I was carried to the side of the room to a couch.  I knew I needed to go to the emergency room, so as soon as the pain decreased slightly, enough to move, my friend drove me to the hospital.

What this means:

1. I am now in an immobilizing brace- mid calf to mid thigh.

2. My knee is swollen like crazy.  It is the size of a grape fruit or maybe a bit larger.

3. I am taking narcotics to try to stay on top of the pain.

4. To add illness to injury, since I can't swallow pills I am taking liquid lortab- sick!

5. I am on crutches.

6. I won't be able to work for a couple weeks, at least.

7. I am not sure if I am going to still be able to go to europe this fall because I will be using a huge chunk of time off for this.  I think this is what hurts the most.

8. I have given up country dancing forever.

After not sleeping much last night I got up and thought I would watch a movie.  Unfortunately the DVD player is on the bottom shelf, almost at the floor and I am quite sure that I won't be able to get to it.  So I laid on the couch all morning watching the nothingness that is on in the morning.  Good times.  If anyone has some extra time and wants to come put a movie in for me, that would be great :)

Oh and we are taking family pictures today.  That ought to be fun.  And I will look very nice with my big brace on.

Some pictures to curb your curiosity.  They really don't do justice to the swelling.  And today my knee is bruised.

Not About Birds

Sometime in my teenage years, I think around 12 or 13, my mom gave me a book.  Actually she gave me two books, but I had completely forgotten about the one until I was organizing my books today.  The other book has never left my memory.  The title: Not About Birds.  

I have never read this book.  To be honest when I picked it up many years ago I am pretty sure I threw up in my mouth a little.  As I recall I got home and the books were on my bed.  We don't talk about things like this in my family.  Apparently, however, we do give each other books.  My mom is big into books.  So today I picked it up and started reading.  What are all the wonderful gems that I have been missing my whole life?  What was puberty all about, anyway? Now all of my questions are being answered!  Thank goodness.

To be honest, I can't actually get through an entire paragraph in this book without almost throwing up while simultaneously laughing out loud.  Not many books make me laugh out loud.  Good job Glen C. Griffen, M.D. and Mary Ella Griffin, R.N.  Well done with the book.

I am planning on sharing some gems with all of you. 

For today we will start with the chapter titles:

1. Girls

2. Boys

3. How the Sperm Gets There

4. How a Baby Is Born

5. Masturbation

6. D-E-F-E-N-S-E

7. What If...

8. "It Is Easier to Remember..."

9. Parents

10. Friends

11. Is It Really Love?

Oh boy, this is going to be fun.  Did I mention that the authors are LDS and that the book was published in 1980 by Deseret Book?  Get ready, this blog is going to become very educational, or something.

Housewarming!

I am having a housewarming.

Saturday July 19.

Starts at 6 pm (1800).

All are invited.

If you want to come shoot me a comment or a phone call or email or something.  Just not a text message since I won't get it.

In an effort to not expose myself too much to the blog world, I am not disclosing any more info on the internet than what is above.

Please come.

Lunch with the Roommies

Last week my old roommate Christine came into town.  To celebrate, we got the old gang together.  It was so good to see Elisa, Lori and Christine (and Chris and Stacey).  We went to lunch and just caught up with each other.  In looking back on all my time together I would have to say that the four of us was the best set of roommates I had while at college.  I loved all of my roommates, but the four of us clicked in a way that was so great.  What a good 8 months!

Now 2 of us are married and there are 3 kids amongst the married ones.  My how things change.  I guess I should get on the ball!

Better today than a year ago

There is something about the Johnsons, or to be more accurate the Ashworths.  See when we gain weight our faces expand exponentially.  It is really quite sad.  I know a lot of overweight people who maintain nice faces.  I also know a lot of Ashworths that have huge faces anytime they gain weight.  I could name names, but I will spare you.  I could post pictures, but that just wouldn't be nice.

I have lost a decent amount of weight since I finished college, and probably most of it was this calendar year.  I may not be exactly where I should be, but I am doing better than previously.  I have hit a snag lately because I can't go to the gym.  It is not fun.  It is a long story and involves some very unfortunate responses to sweating in which I actually think my body has developed an allergy to itself.  Luckily, I think I may be coming closer to an answer to the problem, thus a return to frequenting the gym.  Yeah!

However, looking back at pictures from graduation and from now, I look amazingly different.  Someone should have staged an intervention back in 2007.  Things got bad.

I think this was about March of 2007, the arm size is killer, and the face is expanding.

Moving on to graduation, April 2007.  It is no wonder that I never felt like I could never find sunglasses that fit without bumping annoyingly against my cheeks.  I think my face is about to pop.  It is amazing I can even open my eyes.

And this is from saturday night.  Not my all time best, but boy is it better than it was.  I think the straight hair makes me look thinner.  If it wasn't so time consuming, I would do my hair straight more often.  Too bad for being lazy.  At least I actually have a neck now.  And the double chin situation has improved greatly.

Update: just got back from the gym and it was not as bad as it has been.  Hopefully this is going to be a trend and not a fluke.  Lets hope for the best.

Hair chop

I got my hair cut today.  I was planning on growing my hair out and only cutting an inch or less off.  Then I got the haircut thrills.  This happens almost every time I get my hair cut.  Turns out there are a few things in which I have no self control: the snooze button, eating strawberries even though I think I am allergic (more on that later), growing my hair out...

So Betsy (my stylist) convinced me to cut a little more off since it is summer time and my hair is so darn thick.  And let me tell you, it took very little convincing.  She said she would leave it long enough for a pony tail.  I am not sure that is what actually happened.  However, so far I really like the cut.  It is sort of an A-line.  This cut is supposed to look good curly too (since that is my every-day hair).  However, my chubby face and curly curly short hair tends to equate to a very convincing Shirley Temple look.  Thats cool.  I mean people already think I am a teenager, so I might as well make an effort to look young, right.  Meanwhile, I will do the straight thing for approximately 1-2 more days, depending on how it looks without being washed when I wake up tomorrow and Monday.

In other good news, Betsy said that she thinks I am prettier than I used to be.  I am choosing to take it as a complement, and not think about what it means about my previous appearance.  By the way I am not wearing makeup in the following pics.  So much for pretty.

Lets start with the front:

And now we will move to the side:

And finish with the back:

What do you think?  Pictures courtesy of my Mac. I need to actually decorate at some point.

I don't like being pressured by your sales pitch

Today I went to one of those time-share sales pitches.  I hate these sorts of things, but I went as a favor for a friend.  You are welcome.

So it went something like this:  First we met in a big group and got a quick introduction from a guy who really thought he was funny.  And who was really impressed that I travel so much (p.s. I don't travel THAT much).  He kept saying "everyone except her..." and pointing to me, because I was already a traveler.  Good start.

Then we went back to sit and talk with a salesman one-on-one.  This is where the fun really started.  Things were going okay (I am being very generous here), until he started laughing at me.  He kept asking how much I pay for hotels.  I kept saying that I never stay in hotels.  This was unheard of to him, how could I travel so much and not stay in hotels?  Apparently it was not acceptable to him that I stay with friends and family.  And weird to him that I have friends and family in so many places.  Here is part of our conversation:

Him: "You are going into debt for your hotels"

Me: "I don't stay in hotels"

Him: "But paying for hotels that you do not own is like going into debt"

Me: "I don't think you understand the concept of 'debt'"

Him: "Yes I do, you are paying money for something you do not own"

Me: "No, debt is when you spend more than you earn.  It is a very simple concept.  I do not spend more than I earn, therefore I am not in debt (except for my condo, but that is a different category)"

Him: "...."

As we went on I just got more sassy and more fired up.  Eventually he said "Now, you are a smart girl, so..." at which point I cut him off and responded "Yes, I am."  He wasn't expecting that.

Next we had a great conversation where he insisted that since I often do not pay for hotels in the places I go, then I must not be traveling where I want to go, only where I can go.  We argued this topic for several minutes.  Apparently smart travelers are not part of their time-share.  And I am not allowed to enjoy vacations that are inexpensive or in which I visit friends/family.

So then his sales-person friend came over and tried to give me pricing.  He made a big mistake by starting with "can you afford $10 a month?"  I said "yes, I can afford $10 a month, but the real question is whether I want to pay you $10 a month."  He just got up and left the table.  But since he had not quite had enough, he came back and asked again if I could afford $10/month.  I said, "that sounds great and all, but I really hate paying interest.  It makes me mad.  And if I pay you $10/month for the next...forever... then I am paying an awful lot of interest to your company, and that seems like a bad idea to me."  His amazing response "But it is only $10 per month, even if all you pay is interest it is really inexpensive."  Seriously.  Do I really want to just pay interest and never actually pay down the cost of the time-share.  And, to top it off, the actual price was much higher than $10/month.

Is anyone surprised that I did not take the bait?  Is anyone surprised that when the 4rd guy sat down to talk to me about my overall experience that day I told him it was a 6 (scale of 1-10), and that I was being very generous in rating the experience a 6?

At least I got a lot of laughs out of it.  And $40 in Home Depot gift cards.  And a 4 day, 3 night stay in my choice of Las Vegas, Orlando, Reno, Kona (Hawaii) or Los Cabos (Mexico).  Where should I go?

Wednesday

Lets start at the beginning.  I have a hard time swallowing.  This is because my esophagus has decreased motility.  It is not very fun, trust me.  Also, in just the last 2 months or so I break out in hives everytime I sweat.  That is not fun either, I promise.  So after getting home from work on Wednesday morning I took an Allegra (prescribed by my dermatologist to help with the hives).  I have had a difficult time swallowing pills for a very long time, but thought I would be okay, the pill is relatively small and is round.  Well that was about 8am.  The pill lodged in my throat.  I will spare you the details, but lets just say at 2pm the pill was still lodged in my throat and I was still unable to swallow even a drop of liquid.  Things were going really well at this point.  I decided that I probably should not be alone since there were several times when I couldn't breath at all during the previous 6 hours.  So, I headed over to my parents house.  No one was home.  Hmm.  I called my doctor and they said that if I could be there in 3 minutes (2:20) I could come, or I would have to wait until 2:50.  I promised them I would be there in 3 minutes, they told me to drive safe and I headed over.  I got there and everyone could see I was in a fair amount of distress.  (gagging and wretching for 6 hours will do that to you).  They got me back to a room (although they first had to get my weight and height...seriously- priorities people).  The medical assistant person took my blood pressure, heart rate and respiratory rate.  My blood pressure was 135/94 (I think), my heart rate was very near 120.  Her comment was "your blood pressure is normal, except the bottom number is a little high".  What?!?  For those of you not in the health profession, the high end of normal for blood pressures is 120/80.  I was definitely hypertensive.  And, she was not concerned about my heart rate at all.  Normal heart rate is definitely less that 100.  The doctor was concerned when he came in because he immediately took my pulse again.  Then he told me that I would be getting an emergency endoscopy.  Ooh, fun.

After a couple phone calls he told me to go over to the hospital.  I was to go through emergency so they could admit me, then I was to go to endoscopy, they would be waiting for me.  I got to the hospital, my sister-in-law Liz was waiting for me (I had called to ask if she would be so kind as to drive me home from the hospital when the test was over since I would be sedated).  I won't go into the details, but an hour after we arrived at the hospital we finally found the endoscopy lab.  Apparently the staff at the hospital still do not know where things are.

They got me set up immediately, sedated me and got to work.

They couldn't fit the endoscope down my throat so they had to use a bronchoscope (a much smaller scope used to look at the lungs), which barely fit.  Then they had to work really hard to dislodge the pill.  So apparently my throat is about 11mm in diameter, whereas normal throats are around 20mm in diameter.

It has been almost two days and it still hurts to eat (my throat tore when he tried to dilate it).  So, I am still on a liquid/soft diet.  Which mainly consists of mashed potatoes.  Good times.

I am hungry.

cycles of hunger

Life has interesting cycles.  For example, my cooking habits have cycled.  In junior high I was all about cooking and I actually cooked quite a bit.  Some in High School.  Then I got to college.  For the first year I held my own.  Mostly easy to make boxed meals.  But I ate.  Then I moved home for the summer.  I found myself totally reverting to being completely useless and dependent.  It was pretty crazy.  I made my way through the rest of college and actually ate pretty well with homemade food and lots of leftovers.  Then I moved home again and reverted again.  There is just something about mom making you dinner.  Now I have moved out and have yet to fix a real meal.  I have lived here almost a month.  I eat lots of cereal and granola bars.  Occasionally I make an omelet or have chips and salsa.  On really crazy days I have a quesadilla.  And until my yogurt supply dried up, I was eating lots of yogurt.  Now all that is in my fridge is cheese and milk.  It is going really well.  Any ideas of how long this cycle is going to last?

Oh and I go over to my parents several times a week for dinner.  That will keep up until they change the locks.

More pics

Go here to see pics of my place.  Right before I moved in.  This is the lazy way of posting.

six things

1. Yesterday I moved in. I don't have internet access because apparently the 4 neighbors that have wireless do not like to share. I don't think they passed Kindergarten. I remember sharing and cutting being very important parts of the curriculum in Kindergarten.

2. One of my neighbors came by with her dog to say hi. She told me that all the cars get broken into in our neighborhood. That stinks. Maybe they will just take my whole car so that I will have an excuse to get a new one. I almost killed my car yesterday. Apparently cars need oil. Weird.

3. I refuse to turn my heater on because summer is coming, dangit. So, I absolutely froze while sleeping before/after work last night. I might reconsider the heater thing tonight. If I am really cold. And feel like a human popsicle. Or, maybe if I can see my breath.

4. I have 1 fork, 1 spoon and 3 knives. If you come to visit and expect to eat we either have to take turns or not use proper flatware. Oh, and I don't have any plates. But I do have a lid to a casserole dish that I used to eat my burrito yesterday. I am high class.

5. My dad doorbell ditched yesterday. I wasn't home. He left a couch on my porch. An upholstered couch. It stayed there until after I got home from church today and my brother could help me move it inside. I am officially white trash. So much for making friends in my new place.

6. Pictures to come. Will represent the current state of my condo.

On Saturday I became a professional photographer

So I showed up at my friends wedding and after the ceremony we were all standing outside the temple waiting for the bride and groom to come out, the usual.  As I am standing there, I look around repeatedly and notice that no one has a nice camera but me (I am not a professional).  I kept looking around, and no one came.  Then out came Mary and Jake, and no one came.  So, I very quickly became the photographer.  The day went something like this:

Me: "um, how about everyone on Jake's side get in the shot, then smile"

"ooh, look what they did, lets do that"

"yeah, kissing seems like a good theme, try that again."

Essentially we walked around temple square and stole other people's photo ideas.  It was pretty awesome.  

And, sadly, the temple is crooked in most of the shots, you know, leaning tower of pisa style.  Luckily, they got exactly what they paid for.  Maybe even more because somehow my camera manages to take good pictures without my help.

Here are some of my favorites.  The little kid with the flowers definitely just pulled them out of the ground at the reception.  Then a little girl ran after him screaming about how he needed to give them back.  She got the flowers from him and ran around with them for a while.  It was great.